Trapped on Duo Island!!
by Mei - Tsuchi no Otome
Summary: A hilarious spinoff of Survivor where 8 contestants fight for the ultimate prize! Who will win the affection of our favourite braided pilot? Read to find out! UPDATE! Now with a SPOOF EPISODE! Where you'll meet Judge Une, Psycho Hilde, Talkshow Host Dorth
1. Intro

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Prolouge

Hello and welcome to the intro of the new series, Trapped on Duo Island! It's a little spinoff of Survivor where the players must answer questions and fight against eachother in challenges to win our most loved braided-bishounen! I've selected the 8 contestants from the most popular 2x/x2 couples. So here they are:

Heero Yuy, aka. Odin Lowe Jr.   
Quatre Raberba Winner  
Trowa Barton  
Chang Wufei  
Hilde Schbeiker  
Relena Peacecraft  
Cathrine Bloom  
Zechs Marquise, aka. Milliardo Peacecraft

So, now that you've seen the contestants, you pobably realize that because there are more guys than girls, there is a good chance that the winner will be a boy. Which means YOAI/SHOUNEN-AI content. You can still read most of the series though, as it is neutral. 

There are no tribes in this game, It will work that each person will live seperately until the merger later on, and the luxury item challenges will be for information and pictures of Duo, because to survive in this game there will be a test about the shinigami every certain amount of days. After the merger there will be one immunity challenge. But I may change the previous info depending on what happens, so if you, the readers are ready...

**LET THE GAMES BEGIN!**

If you would like to see more of my series, please review!

Ja ne!  
~AnimeGurl 


	2. Episode 1

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Ep. 1

Okay! On demand... (by the people who reviewed) Here is the beginning of Trapped on Duo Island! Once again, here are the contestants... (Mouseover for names)

The eight contestants are waiting in the plane to get dropped by parachute to thier assigned section of the island.

-AnimeGurl(me, the host) walks in-

AnimeGurl: okay guys! this is it! Heero, you drop first! in 10... 9... 8...  
Heero: Mission Accepted. *grabs parachute*  
AnimeGurl: 3... 2... 1..  
-Heero jumps, and the plane flies to the next section-  
AnimeGurl: *takes list* next, Quatre! 10... 9... 8...  
Quatre: okay! bonzieee! *stands at the door and jumps*  
-The plane moves to the next part of the island-  
AnimeGurl: Relena... go, in 10... 9... 8...  
Relena: *puts on parachute* I'm scared...  
AnimeGurl: Oy... you know, Heero's probably still in the air!  
Relena: Heero? *jumps out* HEEEEE~RRRRRO!!!! CAN YOU HEAR ME?  
Wufei: baka onna...

And so, all the other contestants jump out

AnimeGurl: So, you can now figure out that the island is divided into 9 sections...  


You may have noticed I'm sharing a section with the *prize* and some of you know that Duo's my fave character... I wont do anything inappropriate... I promise... *gets big kawaii eyes* Okay, ahem... back to the game...

At the east end of the island

Quatre: *walks to the end of his border* Heero?  
Heero: Hn...  
Quatre: well, Heero, isn't this game a bit... well, odd? And could I have an actual answer?   
Heero: Actually, I don't find it that wierd... at least it's a little different than the original suvivor cliche, right?  
Quatre: I guess so... yeah, actually you're right, this could be interesting. I wonder who will fail the first round of testing?  
Heero: *grunts* It'll be you if you don't start reviewing your basic shinigami fact booklet that we got... and your own info about Duo...  
Quatre: oh yeah! I better study, It would be pretty embarassing to be the first to go, huh? Ja ne Heero! *runs to his tent*

At the northwest end, Cathrine and Hilde are talking

Hilde: Hey, you're Trowa's sister, right?  
Cathrine: Sure am! And you're Hilde, aren't you?  
Hilde: Yup!  
Cathrine: I think that you and Duo are more than just friends, and I bet you'll definitley reach the final three, if not win!  
Hilde: you really think?  
Cathrine: Why not! I mean, unless Duo isn't telling us something...  
Hilde: Well, gay Duo or not, you gave me a boost of confidence about winning, Cathrine, so I think I'll take a look at this so I can pass Test 1... *holds up the shinigami facts book*  
Cathrine: glad to have helped... *turns around and grins evilly*  


At the southeast end

Relena: Dear brother, how did YOU get into this game?  
Zechs: I'm guessing its the long hair deal...  
Relena: but Heero doesn't have long hair...  
Zechs: *sweatdrop* then there must be another reason.   
Relena: And sure, I don't mind being with Duo, I wouldn't mind winning, but Heero can't! I mean, I was surprised that most of this lot were boys... but, Heero and Duo???? I don't understand...  
Zechs: *thinking* _Relena, you baka, they're the one of the most popular pairings... _*Turns to Relena* like I said my sister, it's for a reason.  
Relena: but WHY???  
Zechs: *looks at watch* I don't know, but listen... It's late, and I'm TIRED. See ya tomorrow... *leaves*  
Relena: *turning back to her side and wlking to her tent* WHY couldn't they have put me beside HEERO? I wanted to see him change... *pats the binoculars around her neck*

Next morning, at the northeast end

Trowa: *walks to his border* Wufei, we have mail...  
Wufei: *turning in his sleep* INJUSTICE! In the name of NATAKU I will PUNISH YOU!!!   
Trowa: *sweatdrops* Wufei! wake up!  
Wufei: *rolls out of his tent into the dirt* Pfft! yuck! *spits, and looks up to see Trowa* Oh, hey Trowa... what did you say?  
Trowa: *holds up a scroll* we've got mail...  
Wufei: *goes to his mailbox and pulls out the scroll*

_If Duo Maxwell is what you desire,  
You must know his looks and attire,  
If you win this challenge, which takes place at noon,  
You will find yourself not leaving so soon!_

At noon, the 8 GW characters arrive at the challenge area. (In the Duo part of the map)

AnimeGurl: heya peeps! Ready for Duo Item Challenge #1? Well here it is!

1st Leg: Swim across the lake. In the middle of the lake is one brush per person. Take the brush with you, but don't get it wet.  
2nd Leg: *points to table* at this table are several oyster shells. One of the contains an elastic band. Find it and keep running!  
3rd Leg: Run across the sand and keep going until you reach your station. There you wil have to braid the manican's brown hair.

AnimeGurl: when everyone it finished, I will come and rate you by speed in reaching the target, and closest resemblance to Duo's hair. You will become disqualified I you have lost the brush or elastic band.The winner gets this... *hold up a photo album*

Contestants Ready? *everone lines up*

GO!

1st Leg: Heero in the lead, followed by Trowa, Wufei, Quatre, Cathrine, Zechs, Hilde, and Relena...  
-Heero reaches the table and begins cracking the shells-  
2nd Leg: Hilde, who has fould her elastic in the first shell, has taken the lead, with Quatre and Wufei and hot pirsuit. Heero is catching up...  
3rd Leg: Heero has again taken the lead. Order: Heero, Quatre, Wufei, Hilde, Trowa, Zechs, Cathrine. Relena has lost the elastic in the sand.

AnimeGurl: *comes up and looks at the briads* Lets see, wwellll... Heero came first, but Quatre, who came second, has made a a nicer braid. Quatre, you have become the first Duo Item Winner! How'd you do it?

Quatre: *blushes* well, when you were a kid and had 29 sisters, sometimes you have to help them with thier hair...  
AnimeGurl: Well, Quatre-kun, Congrats! you go and look that over... okay, back to your sections, everybody!

Quatre: *to camera* Well, I think I'll be sleeping safe tonight. I mean, I've really only seen Duo in one outfit... I don't know what his second favourite is! 

Day 3

Trowa: *to camera* in one hour we all will be going up to the testing building. *grabbing his canteen* Well, I better start now, I have a pretty long walk...

Hilde: *to camera* I could have won! But that little blonde Quatre- he beat me! and that Heero, there's just something about him that makes me uneasy... he seems strong... *looks at watch* I better leave now...

-Everyone has arrived at the testing building-

AnimeGurl: Welcome! You are about to take Shinigami Survival Quiz #1. The person with the lowest score will be asked to leave the island tonight. Please take a seat in there... *Points to a classroom* The reason the desks are in stalls is that you don't cheat... Good Luck!

-Everyone takes a seat, and grabbs their silver pen. The test is on black paper.-

*15 minutes later*

AnimeGurl: *takes all the tests* Well, I hope you studied. One of you will be gone by tomorrow. See you at tribal council tonight, where I will announce the fist person to have failed the test of Duo Island. You must now immediately leave and return to your camps.

Quatre: *to camera* You know, I don't think Relena deserves to even be here. I mean, the only person she wants is Heero. I can hear her talking to herself over my border, and it's freaking me out. She is acting like a stalker... I bet Heero already knows, but it wouldn't hurt to let him know... *walks over to Heero*

Heero: hn...  
Quatre: Heero, Relena is...  
Heero: I know.  
Quatre: And she's saying-  
Heero: I know.  
Quatre: but you'd never guess that she really-  
Heero: I. Know.  
Quatre: and-  
Heero: DAMMIT QUATRE! I"M THE PERFECT SOLDIER! AND SHE **STALKS** ME! I REALIZE THIS!  
Quatre: well, sooo~rrrrrry!

Tribal Council

AnimeGurl: well, here you all are. Before I tally the test scores, there's a little vid-mail from Duo for you guys to see... *presses a button and the screen on a bolder lights up* 

-Vidcam-  
Duo: hey all you survivors at the council! I hope that the people there who really care about me are doing fine, because, well, you should be! So I'd just like to tell you that I'm watching, becuase every night after tribal council I get to watch the tape of you guys! So I can see you! Be careful what you say around the camera! Okay? And, Melissa (AnimeGurl)? Couldja do me a favor and write a big red '**F**' in permanent marker on the first losers forehead? *grins evilly* thanks!

  
-Contestants becom nevous and gulp-  
AnimeGurl: *smiles and turns off the screen* I'll go tally the test scores.  
*returns*  
Okay, the scores were:  
Heero: 90%  
Quatre: 90%  
Wufei: 82%  
Hilde: 80%  
Trowa: 79%  
Zechs: 74%  
Cathrine: 68%  
Relena: 47%

AnimeGurl: *shakes head* I don't even know why 2xR even exists. Relena, what a faliure... please bring up your mini beam-sycthe. *takes the sycthe and turns the beam off* The test scores have spoken.  
Relena: *gulp* not my beautiful head!  
Melissa(AnimeGurl) takes a hude red marker and puts a big **F** on her head.  
Relena: HOW am I going to get this out???? Wah!

-Relena's confessional-

I can't help it if I don't know how long your briad is Duo... or that you always wear black? Why me! my beautiful head! I'm leaving this wacko island... I need a facial!

~Next Episode~ 

~Many of the contestants take a hand a fishing!

~More fun braid-related activities!

~Not your usual lunchtime meal...


	3. Episode 2

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Ep. 2

Welcome to the second episode of Trapped on Duo Island! Once again, here are the contestants... (Mouseover for names) btw, I'm going to start reffering to myself as Melissa, just cause I like using my real name, akay?

Day 4

Quatre: *to camera* I had a feeling Relena was going to go. And I have to admit, Tribal council was as funny as hell, especially the permanent marker trick... A great thing about Duo is his sense of humor, and I have a feeling that his little Vidcam visits on tribal council is a way of subtly flirting... but anyways, Heero is extremely happy now that Relena is off the island... he's in an unusually good mood, and he's actually _talking normally_ to people...  
Heero: Ding, dong the bitch is gone! Can we get Cathrine off next?

-Meanwhile, at Melissa (AnimeGurl) and Duo's section-

Duo: So, Mel-chan... now that Relena's gone, what are we gonna do with her section? *snickers* I still can't get over tribal council last night. And the hidden cameras all over the island... and-  
Melissa: Wufei's salior moon dream...  
Duo: *laughs* I know!!!   
Melissa: anyways, to answer your question, I have to go take over Relena's section... It's host/prize land now...  
Duo: *sweatdrop* It's so wierd to be reffered to as the prize... and how come I can't go with you to set up the next challenge area?  
Melissa: because I can't let you make actual contact with any of the contestants until the final challenge...  
Duo: but... *gets big shiny eyes* PLEASE? You siad that I can put as much influence on the challeneges as I want...  
Melissa: *melts* eee... I'm such a sucker for that face... and I know I'm giving him too much control..  
Duo: hey! it's MY Island!  
Melissa: and, if it's a good game, and we get high ratings and lots of reader reviews, I might write an epilouge fic with you and the winner on a tropical vacation here...  
Duo: Tropical vacation? Hai!

-In Relena's old area-

Melissa: okay Duo, so what do you want tomorrow's challenge to be?  
Duo: well, *looking at his hair* I liked the braid idea yesterday, so how about you-  
*lots of chattering is heard*  
Melissa: thank godness I'm supplied with powers to do this job... *sparks fly from her author's wand*  
Duo: yay! another challenge desinged by the prize himself!  
Melissa: now you do _Me_ a favour...  
Duo: like what?  
Melissa: *leads him back to the prize resort* _You_ have to read some of my fanfics...  
Duo: okay... what are they about anyways?  
Melissa: *laughs* you'll see... besides, this _is_ one of my fics, you know, but the others are all unique in their own ways...

-later...-

Zechs: *to camera* okay, my ditzy sister is out of the picture... but who's next? I'm not even sure if I can make it to the merger, let alone the final three... And what sort of luxury item will we be getting? And another thing, we all haven't eaten since we left the plane, and if they won't feed us, then what?

-The loudspeaker blares across the island-

Melissa: *into loudspeaker* Tonight will be the onlly free dinner you will get during your stay on the island! Tonight at the dinner you will recieve some survival materials so that you may feed yourself further into the game! Meet at the entrance to the resort in front of the fountain!

Hilde: I don't know how to fish! Could you teach me, Cathrine?  
Cathrine: I'll try...

Cathrine: *to Camera* Hilde's acting so dependent towards me after I made that compliment to her that time. The only reason I did that is I needed someone on my side in case I made it to the merger, but now it's going too far...

-That night, at the main resort-

Duo: but Melissa...  
Melissa: Duo, how many times do I have to say, no contact with the contetsents until the final challenge!  
Duo: Mel-chan... can I please just SIT at the table? I won't talk to them... I'd be so lonely eating by myself...  
Melissa: umm...  
Duo: pleee~eeeese????  
Melissa: eep! fine... Duo-kun... they'll be here in ten minutes, I'll put another chair at the table.

-Everyone arrives, Duo and Melissa are sitting at the head of the table-

Melissa: hey everyone! welcome to the only free dinner most of you will be getting on the island!  
Quatre: that's a refreshing thought...  
Heero: Duo! *smiles*  
Melissa: as much as I support 1x2, Heero, I can't grant ya special privilages... yet.  
Heero: okay...  
Duo: *curses*  
Hilde: no fair... Duo, you can't pick favourites now!

-And dinner passes in a similar fashion...-

Melissa: okay, now you guys will recieve a knife and fishing equipment for each of you so you can feed yourselves.  
Cathrine: Yes!  
Zechs: Finally!  
Wufei: Justice! Though the onna could have given it to us sooner...  
Melissa: I _heard_ that, Wufei...  
Wufei: Weak onna...  
Melissa: *sparks fly from her wand and eyes flash slightly* and you said what, Wufei?  
Wufei: Umm... nothing!  
Trowa: typical Wufei...  
Quatre: *nods in agreement*

Day 5

Trowa: *to camera* It's great that we have fishing gear now, and I found that we also each have a canoe in our sections... I'm gonna go catch me some fish...  
Wufei: Injustice! I've never fished before... maybe I can make myself a katana with that knife... *falls out of the boat*  
Cathrine: *catches a fish, sees Wufei, and starts to hum the Baka Song (from Ranma 1/2)*  
Wufei: *curses* Weak Onna!  
Cathrine: Yeah, a weak onna that can fish... *smirks*  
Wufei: *contiues cursing*

Quatre: *looking at the photo album, slightly grinning*  
Heero: *walks over and attempts to look over Quatre's shoulder* There isn't hentai in there Quatre, is there?  
Quatre: *blushes and falls over* Wha-? oh, Heero, of course not!  
Heero: but still, I wanna see the book...  
Quatre: no!  
Heero: Please?  
Quatre: no!  
Heero: Omae o korusu... *shoves his hand in his spandex* What? no gun! Damn...  
Quatre: well, since you can't have my book, I suggest you look at today's challenge... *holds out a message*

_We can see the look of love in your eyes,  
So for you we have cooked up a special surprise,  
Through an obstacle course you will have to run,  
The winner gets a meeting with Duo-kun!_

Heero: *gets a glint in his eye* meeting, huh? Okay...

-At the challenge beach-

Melissa: alrighty, here's a challenge I bet everyone REALLY wants to win... but maybe some people especially...  
Heero, Quatre, Wufei & Hilde: *grin*  
Melissa: okay, so here's how it works. You will climb up those beams and then swing across the water using the braid-shaped ropes and then climb down the next beam. then when all of you get to the finish line you will be arranged in a circle around a table. I will spin the wheel and whatever appears infront of you, you will have to eat.Okay? Contestants ready? GO!

-Trowa, with his amazing acrobatic skills, jumps his way up the beam and practically flies with the rope-braid to the other side. He jumps down off the beam, with Heero and Wufei trailing not too far behind.-

Trowa: *runs to the finish line* first! *stands at the table*  
Heero: Second...  
Wufei: Third!  
-and everyone arrives until they are all at the table-

Melissa: okay, *lifts the cloth to reveal all this stuff from under Duo's bed, and spins the wheel* 1, 2, 3... EAT!  
Heero: *downs his moldy sandwich peice in not time at all* Done!  
Melissa: *smiles* Okay, Heero, after your lunchtime meet me in front of the resort. You get 30 minutes alone with Duo, and then if you like, you can stay at the resort with both me and Duo. But you have to be back at your section before dinner, as we can't give ya free meals yet. Sorry.  
Heero: Okay!   
  
Quatre: *to camera* I'm kinda jealous of Heero. I mean, I have a feeling that Duo likes him the most, and then he wins this challenge... I don't even wanna think about what they're gonna do for that 30 minutes...  
Heero: *out on the lake ctaching fish* I need to have a good lunch so I can have LOTS of energy for later...

-At the resort-

Melissa: heya Heero! I hope the readers realize that I did not rig this in any way, and it's mostly randomness and popularity choice who wins these challenges. So, I'll be taking you to Duo's room?  
Heero: yeah...  
Melissa: *opens Duo's door to see him dancing on his bed in black boxers*  
Duo: I'm Shinigami the real Shinigami and all you other Shinigamis are doing it wrongy...  
Melissa: Duo.. in... boxers? *falls down drooling*  
Heero: *steps over Melissa into Duo's room and closes the door* Hey Duo...  
Melissa: *gets up* damn... one of these days I'm gonna write a 2xAuthor fic... I just can't resist this anymore! Well, better leave those two alone...

[Author's Note: I'm not really the type that would go copying Eminem lyrics since I don't really like him, but it seemed appropriate... thats all ^_^;]

-After 30 minutes, Heero and Duo walk out of the Resort door in swimsuits-

Heero: Duo, that's some penthouse suite you got there...  
Duo: *grins* It's all part of being the *prize*...  
Heero: Well I'm gonna make sure that you'll be MY prize...  
Duo: *giggles* okay... Hey Melissa, wanna come swimming with us?  
Melissa: *grins* Sure! *is zapped into a bathing suit*  
Heero: how _does_ she do that?

Heero: *after he's left the resort, to the camera* This afternoon sure was fun, especially with Duo, and Melissa's pretty nice once you get to know her, but I kinda feel bad for her because Authors can't really pair themselves up with anybody, because other people get jealous... oh well, her loss!

Quatre: So Heero, how'd it go?  
Heero: Welll.. I don't think you wanna know...  
Quatre: riight. I mean, what did you do after?  
Heero: just hung around with Duo and the host... it was pretty cool.  
Quatre: *sighs* Wish it coulda been me...

Day 6

Hilde: *to camera* I'm really worried. I mean I thought I was gonna get Duo in the palm of my hand, but now it seems differently after Heero and Duo's little episode 2 nights ago... I hope there isn't some bond between them I'm not missing...

-At the testing Area-

Melissa: *points to a row of computers* This is where you'll be taking the test, and it's a multiple choice. Scores will be calculated from the Tribal council computer tonight and one of you will leave the island. And also, the tests become harder as they go along... good luck!

-30 minutes later, the contestents are all finished and return to thier sections-

[Author's note: I'm going to skip right to Tribal council now.]

Tribal Council

Melissa: and once again, here's Duo from the Vidcam... *presses a button*

-Vidcam-  
Duo: Heya everyone! Well, after this vote, there will be six people left on the island. And after the next tribal council, when we get to five, The next day there will be a merger and you all will go from living seperatley into a tribe of five. After two councils the final three will be picked... but I'm not gonna say any more. You'll find out more later. Bye!

Melissa: And now, the long-awaited test scores. *walks to the island computer*  
Heero: 82%  
Quatre: 80%  
Wufei: 76%  
Hilde: 74%  
Trowa: 71%  
Cathrine: 62%  
Zechs: 50%

Melissa: Okay, Zechs, or Milliardo, please bring up your mini-beam sycthe. You know, I knew the long hair reason was to odd to be true, guess this proves it, huh? *turns off its beam* The test scores have spoken.

-Zech's Confessional-

Well, I don't have much to say, I mean, I don't think my heart was into this, not even at the beginning. I mean, I'm not really DUo's type. Besides, I'm too old for him! I just don't understand why people put me and Duo together, I mean, okay, besides the hair, what else? I mean really-

Camera Guy: *yawns* Okay, Mr. Marquise, or whoever you are, We've heard enough, now just do me a favour and leave before I fall asleep?

~Next Episode~

~More details of the merger revealed...

~Is Duo really choosing sides already?


	4. Episode 3

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Ep. 3

Welcome to the third episode of Trapped on Duo Island! Here are the contestants... (Mouseover for names) 

Day 7

Heero: *to camera* It's like a dream come true! both of the Peacecrap- I mean Peacecrafts are gone! Yessss!

Trowa: *to camera* I'm not sure, but somehow I have a distinct feeling that my sister will be gone next, she has no real relatation to Duo...

-At Heero and Quatre's section-

Quatre: *waves the photo album around* Hey Heero, guess you aren't going to bugging me about this much anymore!  
Heero: *narrows eyes* why do you say that?  
Quatre: *smirks* you probably saw more of Duo at that -ahem- 'meeting' than this book would ever show, huh? Or were you just trying to get all the test answers?  
Heero: *turns red* it's none of your business Quatre, besides, this isn't like you-  
Quatre: *realizes what he's saying* Oh my goodness! I'm sorry Heero...  
Heero: *sweatdrops and shakes his head* he's almost as bad as Une- well, maybe not...

-At Trowa and Wufei's section-

Trowa: Wufei, you're seeming a bit edgy lately-  
Wufei: Trowa, I don't know, you wouldn't understand...  
Trowa: "..."  
Wufei: It's really injustice... I mean it's like Heero as an added advantage with that challenge and all-  
Trowa: "..."  
Wufei: Myabe I should just try harder, yeah, that's it! I need to try harder! In challenges, and fishing... I must not be weak! I will bring justice to this side of the game! Thanks for your help, Trowa!  
Trowa: "..."

-At Hilde and Cathrine's Secion-

Cathrine: *is having no luck with fishing*  
Hilde: *reels up her 10th fish* want some, Cathrine?  
Cathrine: how the heck did ya get all that? you said you couldn't fish!  
Hilde: I figured it out...  
Cathrine: *facevaults*  
Hilde: *sweatdrop* anyways, There's a luxury item challenge! and its in a... haiku? What is Melissa thinking?  
Cathrine: *grabs the paper*

_a challenge today,  
at west beach, takes place at noon.  
a good prize awaits._

_-_West beach, 12 o'clock.-

Melissa: Hey everybody! Just to let you know, tomorrow morning you will go straight to testing because you guys will have to start moving to the merger beach and pick a tribe name starting on day 8. On day 9, you will go to tribal council once your tribe is setttled and then on day 10 you will be picking a name and having your first tribal survival itme challenge. I've alsoi change my mind, there will not be testing during the merger. It will be all immunity challenges. Anyways, the challenge today is simple. Use the pole there to vault over the palm tree, and then run to the easel and do a sketch of Duo. You will be tested by speed and picture accuracy. You will win Duo's student ID card and an item of your choice. Contestants ready? Go!

-Trowa and Wufei are the first to get over the palm Trees, with Cathrine and Heero close behind.Wufei finishes drawing first.-

Melissa: *looks at Wufei's picture* well, I must say, I never knew you could draw, Wufei! Here's the card, and your item.  
Wufei: my kitana! how did you know?  
Melissa: why, I just know. *smiles* enjoy...

Wufei: *to camera* I actually won something, maybe I am not as weak as I thought. but I must be STRONG! *twirls his kitana around* now to HUNT like a man! fishing is for the weak...  
Trowa: *sweatdrops*

Quatre: *to camera* wow, I never knew that Wufei was good at art. I would have thought that it would be 'weak' to him... then agfain, I was wrong, wasn't I? You know, there's another thing, I've been feeling insecure lately... I'm worried that a danger may befall me...  
Heero: Quatre?  
Quatre: yeah?  
Heero: I overheard you camera chat. Whatever danger you may feel, there is someone on this Island who will strive to protect you...  
Quatre: what? Tell me Heero, who?  
Heero: I don't think he ould want me to tell you. I'm sorry, Quatre. Maybe at the merger you'll find out... I'm going to get some sleep.  
Quatre: *dazed* yeah, me too...

Day 8

Wufei: *wakes up and looks over at Trowa's tent, and hears him muttering something in his sleep*  
Trowa: *in his sleep* approaching... danger... who?... oh no... it can't be...  
Wufei: *reaches over the fence and pokes Trowa with his kitana cover* Trowa... wake up!  
Trowa: *suddenly sits up and rubs his head*  
Wufei: have you been having visions or something, Trowa?  
Trowa: no... I need more hair gel! quick! I don't want to be a limpy! *dives into his knapsack*  
Wufei: weak... hair.

Hilde: *finishes her lunch and grabs her knapsack* Hey Cathrine, ready to go?  
Cathrine: Sure, I'll miss my area though.

-At the Testing Building-

Melissa: *points to the test room* You know what to do. 

-45 min. later, everyone emerges and meets outside-

Melissa: Group together and pick a person who you think is the smartest in map handling in your tribe.  
*Heero emerges from the group*  
Melissa: alright, *hands Heero the map* your first unoffical tribal challenge is to find your beach.

-After 2 hours and Heero's thurough instructions, the group arrives at an black flag with a note attached.-

_Congratulations!_

_You have found your Tribe's beach. Here you will spend the next few days   
together until your tribe dwindils down to three. Then the final three will  
reicieve further instructions. After tribal council tomorrow you will be   
picking a tribe name. More information will be revealed after tribal council._

_~Melissa and Duo~_

-After the so far nameless tribe has finished setting up their tents, they go to sleep, knowing that at the break of dawn one of the remaining six will be gone from Duo Island.-

Day 8

Quatre: good moring world!  
Wufei: Winner, are you always with pleasant?  
Quatre: of course!  
Wufei: *sweatdrop* thought so...  
Hilde: well you guys? I'm ready to leave, are you?

*the rest of the tribe gets ready and leaves for tribal council.*

-Tribal Council-

Melissa: *points to a chalkboard with six names on it* In no paticular order I will write your test scores on the board. Good luck.

Quatre: 76%  
Trowa: 64%  
Hilde: 60%  
Heero: 80%  
Wufei: 85%  
Cathrine: 57%

Melissa: Cathrine, please bring up your scythe. *turns it off* Please go to confessional.

-Cathrine's Confessional-

I don't have much to say really. I don't really know Duo that well. Trowa, I hope to see you soon, and Hilde, I wish you good luck. Bye y'all!

~Next Episode~

~What is the danger that Quatre is worried about?  
~Will Hilde survive being the only girl?  
~Who is Quatre's supposed keeper?


	5. Episode 4

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Ep. 4

Okay, I can't put pictures anymore becuase the whole concept was ruined by pics from the outside not working in fics. So, I'm just going to rename the contestants like the other survivor stories do. Sorry, folks!

Heero Yuy  
Quatre Raberba Winner  
Trowa Barton  
Chang Wufei  
Hilde Shbeiker  
Cathrine Bloom  
Relena Peacecraft  
Zechs Marquise  


Day 9 (Evening)

-At the Resort- 

Melissa: *In her pj's, turning off the televison set* I'm worried about what Quatre said... but for now, I'm getting some well deserved sleep... wha? *hears thumping in the hallway and goes to the door*  
Duo: *walking drunkily down the hallway, with a now empty bottle of sake*  
Melissa: oh no... I will NOT take advantage of this... or maybe I will... huh? *turns around to see that a glowing, winged chibi has grabbed her arm*  
Chibi: I am the official fanfiction RULEMAKER. I want you to take a second to consider your options at this time. *takes out a long scroll which reaches down to the floor* Ah, here. Your options are:  
a) Go right ahead and spend the rest of the night having a helluva time with your favourite bishounen and get sacked from your job of hosting the show and watch the ratings plummet,  
or:  
b) Make him sober again, preventing all of the above from happening.  
Melissa: *sighs* I give up. I must be crazy for doing this though... *points her author wand at Duo, turning him sober again* Now I'm getting some sleep. *eyes the chibi* You ruined everything. Get lost!   
Chibi: *scoffs* well FIIINE! be that way!

Day 10 

Hilde: okay, good morning everyone! I'll get the mail, okay? will one of you make breakfast?   
Wufei: but you're the onna! you have to cook!  
Hilde: *sticks her tounge out at Wufei and leaves*  
Quatre: it's alright, Wufei, I'll cook. As long as you don't call _me_ an onna... *snickers*  
Wufei: *sweatdrops* sorry, Quatre...  
Hilde: *waves a piece of paper in the air* Hey! We have a luxury item challenge! One of us gets food! Look!

_A labrynth_(sp?)_ is the challenge you will face today,  
Except it's no old cheese that you'll be winning today.  
So run amok in the island heat,  
But the first one through gets a special treat!_

Trowa: *looks at paper* so, a labryth, huh?  
Hilde: what's that?  
Heero: It's a maze.  
Wufei: of course we would'nt expect a baka onna like **you** to know that. huh? *snickers*  
Hilde: *scoffs* And I wouldn't expect a male chauvanist like **you** to know how to fish, right?  
Quatre: *laughs* Looks like Hilde won this catfight, Wufei, and now _you're_ the kitty with the scratch.  
Wufei: *curses and walks off*

-Luxury Item Challenge-

Melissa: *points to a 100x100 metre labrynth, made entirley out of bushes* This is your challenge. Everyone enters through one end, and there is a neacklace with each of your names on it. Find your necklace, put it on, and find your way out. You will all be recieving compasses. But here's the catch. There is a magnet on the pole where your necklace is hanging, so the further you walk from it, the faster you'll reach the end. Oh, and don't try walking through the walls, they're thorny.

Ready? GO!

*about 10 minutes later, Trowa emerges triumphant.*

Melissa: Okay, Trowa! *takes his necklace and presses a button which demagnetises the poles. Arrows to the exit light up and in five minutes everyone is outside of the maze.* Your prize is a nice hot slice of pizza and a nice cold can of pop. Enjoy!

Trowa: Sweet! *takes his pizza and the pop and Quatre, Heero and Wufei stand there amazed, thois being the first time they've heard Trowa say that.*

-And so, the members of Shinigami tribe sit down for dinner.-

Wufei: *to camera* okay, I don't mind having fish for dinner, but I _really_ wish that I had won that thing! Especially since I have to eat that fish that that onna caught, *waves kitana threatingly* I'm going to vote her off the first chance I get!  
Hilde: *smiles while putting some fish on her plate, then points to Wufei and laughs*  
Wufei: INJUSTICE!

Day 11 

Hilde: I'll go out and fish! *is about to grab her fishing gear*  
Quatre: It's okay, Hilde, how about we switch today? You make rice, and I'll catch fish.  
Hilde: Okay Quatre!  


Quatre goes into the water to fish and Trowa sists down to read a book. All of a sudden the fishinmg rod flies up into the air and lands on the beach beside Trowa. He looks up and sees Quatre being pulled into an undertow.

Trowa: *yelling* Quatre! No! Quatre! QUATREE!   
Quatre: help!  
Trowa: *dives into the water*  
Hilde: *runs to the beach* what's going on?  
Wufei: oh no! What in the world is Trowa doing? Is he crazy?  
Heero: *smiles* no Wufei, I was guessing that something like this would come...  
Everyone watches as Trowa uses all his strength to get out of the water. He is now Holding a limp Quatre in his arms, and his face is wet, not only from the water.  
Wufei: man, you're not worried about your hair again, are you?  
Hilde: *smacks Wufei on the back of the head* baka! Can't you see that Trowa is actually worried about Quatre? He's crying!  
Wufei: oh... I'll go get Melissa...  
*Heero and Trowa bring Quatre into the tent and lies him down*

Melissa: *runs into the tent*  
Wufei: onna! why don't you have a first aid kit?  
Melissa: it's called an author wand, and I suggest you shut up so I can take care of this patient. *zaps upa first aid kit and puts and air mask around Quatre's head, which already a lot paler than usual* Sorry, Trowa, but contestants aren't allowed to give eachother CPR. *smiles*  
Trowa: *sits up, startled, and blushes deep pink* oh, uh...  
Heero: *nudges Trowa in the arm* Think you'll be staying very long now, Trowa?  
Trowa: *shakes head and smiles* My heart wasn't in this from the start. I know I'll be gone tomorrow, you guys don't have to be afraid to hide your votes from me. I'll stay here and look after him until he wakes up.  
Melissa: then here's the medicine you'll need to give him, Trowa, and some food. He'll be waking up in about two hours.  
Trowa: thank you. *watches everyone leave the tent* Oh, Quatre... I love you, and I believe that the outcome of this game will tell me weather you love me back... *kisses his forehead*

Day 12

Quatre: Good morning eyeryone! I'm feeling a lot better now.-  
Hilde: did you get good hospitality from your friend?  
Quatre: hospitality?  
Hilde: you don't remember? Trowa took care of you! and he- mmph! *mouth gets covered by Heero's hand*  
Heero: I think it would be best if he didn't know.  
Hilde: mmph!  
Quatre: *looks over at Trowa* Thank you, Trowa, you are a great friend. You helped me survive the undertow!  
Trowa: *walks away* Yeah, a great friend...

-Immunity Challenge-

Melissa: Feeling better Quat-kun?   
Quatre: *nods* yup!  
Melissa: Yeah, you look a lot better now. Alright! *points to an obstacle course* You will all be blindfolded. Duo is sitting up on a ledge there. He will yell instructions to you, and the first person to complete the course correctly, staying blindfolded, wins immunity. Okay?

Ready? GO!

*After 8 minutes and a sore-throated Duo, Quatre comes out with his hands raised and puts on the Immunity Necklace*

Melissa: well! You really are better, Quat! Congrats!  
Quatre: thanks!  
Duo: *hoarsly* Mel-chan? Can I have a pain-killer? My throat kills!  
Heero: *laughs* Funny that phrase it coming from the mouth of the God of Death. *punches Duo playfully in the arm* Feel better. okay?  
Wufei: *growls in jealousy* how come I feel that Heero has a certain advantage?

-Tribal Council-

Melissa: welcome to your first Tribal Council. Those of you who are still remaining with us here have reached the merger using skill. Now you have to use wit and a lot of descision making if you want to make it to the final three. Quatre, start us off.

Quatre: *writes down a name and goes back to his seat*  
Hilde: *writes down a name*   
Wufei: *writes down a name* I was going to vote for the onna, but I change my mind.  
Heero: *writes down a name* It's obvious that you don't belong here. I'm interested to see what the outcome of ttthis game is, not only for my sake but for yours.  
Trowa: *writes down a name*

Melissa: I'll go tally the votes.

*picks up a paper* Trowa.  
*picks up another paper* Trowa.  
Trowa: *smiles to himslef and nods*  
Melissa: *picks up a paper* Hilde.  
Hilde: *looks around nervously*  
Melissa: and the last vote is... Trowa. please bring up your mini beam scythe. *turns it off* The tribe has spoken.  
Trowa: Good bye Heero, and you too Wufei. Quatre, I'm glad your better now. *smiles and walks away to confessional*

-Trowa's Confessional-

Like I said. My heart wasn't in this. I don't feel like saying much else. This is Nanashi, signing off. 

~Next episode~

~Is there a Trowa/Quatre/Duo love triangle?

~Hilde and Wufei can't seem to get along...


	6. Episode 5

**Trapped on Duo Island!  
**Ep. 5

Okay, I found out that smegging geocities won't let me link pics and I'm too lazy to reupload them onto a new server, so live with it people! :-P 

Much Love, 

~AnimeGurl/Melissa

Heero Yuy  
Quatre Raberba Winner  
Chang Wufei  
Hilde Shbeiker  
Trowa Barton  
Cathrine Bloom  
Relena Peacecraft  
Zechs Marquise 

Day 13 (afternoon)

Hilde: (to camera) I had a feeling that Trowa was going to leave. What's the point of him being here if he loves Quatre? Now the Question is if Quatre loves him back or this is all one big love triangle. *giggles* just like a soap opera!  
Wufei: Onna. You would be one tro talk about such garbage wouldn't you?  
Hilde: Yeah but who talks about Sailor Mars in his sleep?  
Quatre: yeah, Wufei... what about Moon Kitana Magic?  
**everyone laughs**  
Hilde: are ya going to start looking for a fuku in your size?  
**more laughing*  
Wufei: INJUSTICE!!!! *goes for his kitana*  
Heero: *watches the others back off at the very pissed Wufei and smirks* That's revenge for you.  
Wufei: Oh yeah Wing boy? You wanna fight do you? *waves his Kitana threatingly*  
Heero: Newsflash, Wufei... you were pissed at Hilde, not me...  
Hilde: *eeps at the charging Wufei and scrambles*  
Quatre: there you go. Pure havoc on the beach. Ta da! it's like mad Wufei in a can, ya know? It doesn't take much to open.

-The Shinigami tribe finishes dinner and heads off to the tent to sleep.-

Quatre: (to camera) In two or three days the final three will be chosen, I should really figure out my last voting strategy... I better go and sleep now, becuase I figure that If I make the final three, I might not be sleeping much... *sly grin* but it seems to be quite a mystery so far...

Day 14

Melissa: *walks into the guys' tent* Wake up! We got ourselves a looong immunity challenge today!  
Guys: *in only their boxers* Gack!  
Melissa: *blushes and grins* Okay, I'll go now. But get up and get dressed!  
Heero: *laughs* that little hentai...

-Immunity Challenge-

Melissa: Simple. Everybody swim to a pole. Stand on it. Last person standing wins immunity.  
Wufei: *huffs* easy.  
Melissa: It _can_ last up to a day, you know...  
Wufei: gack! Injustice!  
Melissa: well whoever thinks they're going to get voted off tomorrow and wants Duo booty baaad will stay up there for God of Death knows how long... ^.^;

Ready? Get up there people! Now I'm going to get me some lemonade... *leaves*

[Time Elapsed: 2 Hours, 6 minutes.]

Melissa: *comes back with iced tea and hot dogs* Who's hungry?  
Quatre: Oh god... I'm starving... *hops off and swims to the shore*  
Melissa: Noone else getting off? Quatre, eat as much as you like.  
Quatre: *grins greedily and digs in*

[Time Elapsed: 6 Hours, 29 minutes.]

Melissa: *comes back* Ice cream, anyone?  
Quatre: Yum! *takes a cone and pours strawberry sauce all over it*  
Wufei: Injustice... *dives into the water, swims to the shore, and takes an ice cream cone*  
Melissa: *takes some for herself* Yum...

[Time Elapsed: 12 Hours, 3 minutes]

Melissa: Now, your ultimate temptation... Duo himself!  
Duo: *blushes* Yeah... I'm da man!  
Heero: Mission... failure. *dives into the water and swims onto the shore*  
Duo: This is one mission you don't mind losing, right Heero?  
Heero: Oh yeah...

Hilde: Hello? What about me? I won Immunity!!!   
Heero, Quatre & Wufei: NOO! I was going to vote for her! *look at eachother and talk simontaniously* You were? So was I! Damn!  
Duo: *laughs* Now who's going of?  
Heero, Quatre & Wufei: *points to a different person* HIM!  
Duo: *falls down laughing*  
Hilde: *swims to shore* I want my necklace.  
Melissa: Here. *hands it to her*  
Hilde: Yess! Aren't you happy I'm going to be in the final three, Duo?  
*everyone looks at him, waiting for his answer*  
Duo: not really.  
Hilde: Whaa~at? damn!  
All: *laugh*  
Melissa: Okay guys, back to camp.

Day 15

-Tribal Coucil-

Melissa: Welcome... you guys know what to do... Hilde, with your immunity Neclace, start us off.

Hilde: *goes and votes* Heero. He and Duo get along too well.  
Quatre: *goes up and votes*  
Wufei: *goes up and votes* Heero. I'm Jealous, period.  
Heero: *goes up and votes*

Melissa: Okay, I'll tally the votes...

*comes back*

Melissa: *takes out a paper* Heero.  
*takes out a paper* Wufei.  
Wufei: *curses*  
Melissa:*takes out a paper* Heero.  
Heero: *surprised, but remains calm*  
Melissa: *takes out the last vote* Wufei. We have a tie. Now, I'm going to go back to previous votes. Heero, you were not voted for last time. Wufei, you had one vote.  
Wufei: What? What? Who was it?  
Hilde: *smiles and waves to Wufei*  
Wufei: INJUSTICCCCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Damn you onna!  
Melissa: Sorry, but it's final, Wufei... *grabs the scythe and turns it off*

-Wufei's Confessional-

Okay, so I do like Maxwell. And Moon Kitana Magic was not my idea! Sailor Moon is weak! I don't watch it! Injustice! Oh well. At least I'm away from the onna. I'm leaving this unjustful hellhole... *stomps off*

~Next Episode~

~A surprise! sorry minna-san! You'll have to wait and see!

[A/N: I need **your** help! Yes you! In your review tell me, now that the final three are chosen... well, do want the show to be rated PG-13... If you get my drift... yes... should it be limey? **You**, the reader, must review and tell me! You decide!!!!]  


  



	7. Finale! Part 1

Untitled Document Trapped on Duo Island!! 

The Ending of ALL Endings - Part 1! 

"And Duo, Heero and Quatre ran into the empty room and minutes later the intense moaning of a passionate threesome could be heard throughout the island--"   
Hilde: *fwaps Melissa upside the head* You BAKA! Duo is MINE!   
Melissa: *cough* yeah, that's what all my _flamers_ seem to think...   
Hilde: Duo is not a [censored] faggot!!!!   
Duo: *appears in the doroway* tsk, tsk... such awful language...   
Hilde: ARGH! everyone is against MEEEE!   
Quatre: looks like a reincarnation of Wufei's hissy fit... only Hilde-ish... 

Melissa: See, I do want comments on who should win, but when put in flames they just thwart my opinions. So Hilde has very grim chances indeed...   
Trowa: *pops in* and you were leaving /me/ out?   
Melissa: *sweatdrops* whoops! Oh yeah, there will be MAD Shounen-ai hints in this ep, so be warned... Oh yes, and there's language too... and suggestiveness... The high demand I mean request for a higher rating has been granted.... MWUAHA! 

Side note: I'm sorry that the first part of the finale will be so short, but I'm really braindead and writer's blocked right now. 

GOMEN NASSAI!   


*****On with the show!**** 

Quatre: *lying down on the beach, twidling his fingers with an insane gleam in his eyes* Hmm...   
(A/N: *cough*ZEROsystemmadness*cough*)   
Quatre: *looks up to see Duo standing next to him*   
Duo: Hey Quatre, I was coming here to tell everyone that-MMMPPH!   
*psychotic Quatre has pulled Duo down into a heated kiss*   
Duo: *yanks himself off* WHOA dude! what's with you! please tell me it's not the ZERO system syndrome again...   
Quatre: *chuckles softly*   
Duo: well, I was just going to say that everyone has to pack up because you're moving near the resort later... yeesh...   
Quatre: Okay... *evil grin* you won't stay for a while?   
Duo: O.o;;; no... thanks... not when you're like this...   
Quatre: *unusually calm* fine...   
Duo: *walks away, disgruntled, and mumbling something about needing a cold shower* 

*at the resort* 

Melissa: *is watching the live recordings of the beach camera and has tears streaking down her face in laughter* Tooo rich! Tooo rich!   
Duo: *flings the door open, fuming* You are a dead author... You ecchi!   
Melissa: *looks on innocently* oh?   
Duo: I know you have some control about what goes on here...   
Melissa: *giggles* I didn't make Quatre horny, if that's what you're asking...   
Duo: *mumbles and walks into the bathroom* I'm irresistable, but that doesn't mean people can catch me off gaurd like that... though I really shouldn't be complaining...   
Melissa: *laughs* he doesn't even know the half of it... 

*** 

Hilde: *haunched over a piece of paper, scribbling* AHA! victory shall be MINE!   
Heero: *sweatdrops and attempts to look over her shoulder* How is a piece of paper going to help you rig the game?   
Hilde: *turns around* YOU NOSY BASTARD! stop looking at *my* private tactics! And who says I'm going to rig it? Duo loves ME!   
Heero: *sweatdrops* riiiight. Rigging the game would be the only way for you to get Duo. And I doubt you're smart enough for that, he doesn't love you.   
Hilde: Nooo... he just doesn't realise it yet... *evil grin*   
Heero: whatever. You aren't worth my time.   
Hilde: *muttering* you wait and see, Heero Yuy, it's not over yet. 

**later** 

Heero & Quatre: *arrive at the resort with their bags* We're here!   
Melissa: *looks around* where's Hilde?   
Heero: you mean the byatch? oh, she's trailing along.   
Hilde: *cough* okay! *sputter* I'm here!   
Melissa: *has a look of utter distaste* what happened to YOU?   
Hilde: *phsycotic grin* oh, nothing...   
Quatre: Melissa, I have a feeling you should have checked her medical papers before admitting her as a contestant...   
Hilde: I HEARD THAT!   
Melissa: *sweatdrops* anyways, you three will be staying at that house *points to a bungalow a little ways off from the author house*   
Quatre: *_* Ooooh! Stucco! Pretty!   
Hilde: stuff a sock in it, gay-boy...   
Quatre: *seething* you... you... Homophobic bitch!!!! Omae o korosu!!!   
Heero: hey! that's my line!   
Hilde: *stomps off into the house* HMPH!   
Melissa: *coos* Quatre, it's time for your blood pressure pil...   
Quatre: *calms down* Oo~kay!   
Heero: *sweatdrops*   
Melissa: I think I'll put Hilde in a seperate living arrangement than you guys...   
Heero: you mean like a metal safe?   
Melissa: that's not a bad idea...   
Quatre: Eheee! Heero! You're my housemate! That means screwing without inturruption!   
Heero: *turns red and facevaults*   
Melissa: I hope Duo isn't watching this... 

*in the room*   
Duo: HEY! Those two are supposed to be for ME! Not eachother! DAMMIT! Somebody /has/ to turn Quatre's horn level DOWN! 

*meanwhile* 

Hilde: *who is now in a small house the size of a garage* Grrrr... you wait and see, you screwy host... you wait and see... *clenches fists in anger*   
  
  
*** 

Oooh! you all are left in suspense (partiallly, I suppose) and again, I'm sorry that this is so short. If you want more,   
please [e-mail me][1] with ideas! 

Luv, 

~Melissa (AnimeGurl) 

   [1]: mailto:tigerlilly527@hotmail.com



	8. Finale! - SPOOF EPISODE!!!!

Trapped on Duo Island! Trapped on Duo Island!! 

The Ending of ALL Endings - SPOOF EPISODE! 

_Melissa (aka. AnimeGurl) walks into a large confrence room, and lightblubs pop and flashes are everywhere. Adjudicator Une is sitting at the front._

Adjudicator Une: this confrence/court session will now begin. Any comments before we commence?   
Melissa: Adjudicator, my eyes are getting a bit sore from...   
Une: right. *yells* PUT A SOCK IN IT YOU GOOD-FOR-NOTHING PAPARAZZI! *cough* er... anyways, let's resume.   
Jury: *nods*   
Une: Miss AG, it has been brought to my attention by Miss Shbeiker's lawyer that you have been mistreating her point of view during the recording of said series 'Trapped on Duo Island!' and making her seem 'unworthy' of said 'prize' Duo Maxwell. Now, do you have authorization to use this young boy as a game-show prize?   
Melissa: *turns to her lawyers and nods* Yes, Ms. Une.   
Une: allright then. Now onto the case of Miss Shbeiker.   
Hilde: I'd like to declare that the author AnimeGurl has done an awful job at having this game show recorded because her camera crew have been taking out all my 'good' parts!   
Une: so then, Miss Shbeiker, you are also noting that you indeed had bad parts.   
Hilde: well, I, er...   
Melissa: Ms. Une, may I turn to the evidence that we use equal amounts of footage?   
::a lawyer rolls in a Tv and Vcr::   
Lawyer: may we suggest, Miss Une, that you take off your glasses so that the glare does not hurt your vision?   
Une: all right then.*takes off her glasses and does her personality change into Anne*   
Melissa: *winks at her lawyer then plays first a clip of Hilde winning Immunity, then one of her yelling her head off at Heero*   
Hilde: *whines* buuuut....   
Anne: now please shush, Miss. Shbeiker. This all seems quite fair to me. Now, was there a witness?   
Melissa: *nods* Yes Miss... er... Anne...   
::Quatre walks in and the lawyer hands him a little bribe (will be a surprise till later!) discretely::   
Quatre: *turns chibi and gets kawaii eyes* Oooh, Miss Anne, Hilde is not always nice, she was mean to Me an Heewo an Twowa and Wuffie... and just evwybody! Even Mewissa! *a big shiny teardrop falls from his eye*   
Jury: awwwww..... *big gush moment*   
Hilde: *growls* how DOES he do that?   
Anne: *smiles* now Quatre, don't you worry, we'll take care of the mean lady, don't you worry... but first, there's something we have to do.   
Melissa: *gets a stare from Hilde's lawyer and puts on a dry tone* ooooh, allRIGHT. Hilde Shbeiker is not a homophobic or a schitzo in the series Gundam Wing. She just acts like this here and CAN be much nicer in other fics. I have now disclaimed Hilde Shbeiker from any blaming of mental illnesses in the actual series.   
Anne: see? it wasn't THAT hard, now was it?   
Melissa: oh NO, not at all.   
Anne: and the verdict is?   
Jury: Melissa will NOT be sued by Hilde because Chibi Quatre said so and Chibi Quatre is toooo cute to be wrong!   
Chibi Quatre: Sankyuuu!!!   
Jury: *smiles*   
Anne: okay then, you have the verdict...   
*puts her glasses on*   
Une: now please, GET OUT! I have lunch break. 

::And now, for a short channel switch!:: 

Announcer: Welcome to the Dorthy-C Show! Starring, Dorthy Catalonia! 

*brief clapping is heard* 

Dorthy: *glares* do I need to show you how lethal my eyebrows can be? 

*LOUD applause ensues* 

Dorthy: *smiles* that's better. Now today, we have Trowa-   
Trowa: Nanashi!   
Dorthy: Trowa Barton here with us today. Trowa was a contestand of 'Trapped on Duo Island!' and unfortunately isn't there right now because he didn't make it that far.   
*a small 'aww' is heard from the audience*   
Dorthy: *nonchalantly taps her left eyebrow*   
*a loud AWWW! is heard*   
Dorthy: Soooo... Trowa, is it true you're romantically interested in Quatre?   
Trowa: *grins* Maybe.   
Dorthy: what about anyone else?   
Trowa: *shrug*   
Dorthy: Heero? Duo? Wufei?   
Trowa: *smile plays across his lips*   
Dorthy: *looks shocked* Audience, have we found out that Trowa is a _slut?_   
_(Audience all perk up at the thought of a slutty Trowa...)_   
Trowa: "..."   
Dorthy: *stands up, pleased* OKAY! So now we know, Trowa is a slu-   
Trowa: *beams as he sees Wufei in the front row, yanks him up an tackles him to the floor in liplock*   
Wufei: O.O...mmmph!...*.*   
_(Audience ROARS_ _in approval)_   
Audience: DORTHY! DORTHY! DORTHY!   
Dorthy: and that's all for today, folks! *gets a close-up* and _never_ mess with my eyebrows. 

****   


::And we now present our _latest_ What-if!:: 

What if the Gundam Pilots went to Hogwarts? (The Sorting Ceremony!)

*cue the Sorting Hat song!* 

Oh, you may not think I'm pretty,   
But don't judge on what you see,   
I'll eat myself if you can find   
A smarter hat than me.   
You can keep your bowlers black,   
Your top hats sleek and tall,   
For I'm the Hogwarts Sorting Hat   
And I can cap them all.   
There's nothing hidden in your head   
The Sorting Har can't see,   
So try me on and I will tell you   
Where you ought to be.   
You might belong in Gryffindor,   
Where dwell the brave at heart,   
Their daring, nerve and chivalry   
Set Gryffinfors apart;   
You might belong in Hufflepuff,   
Where they are just and loyal,   
Those patient Hufflepuffs are true   
And unafraid of toil;   
Or yet in wise old Ravenclaw,   
If you're a ready mind,   
Where those of wit and learning,   
Will always find their kind;   
Or perhaps in Slytherin   
You'll make your real friends,   
Those cunning folk use any means   
To achieve their ends.   
So put me on! Don't be afraid!   
And don't get in a flap!   
You're in safe hands (though I have none)   
For I'm a Thinking Cap! 

.Professor McGonagall: *steps onto the stage and pulls out a scroll of parchment*   
_(A/N: to be quick, only five names will be counted. *grin*)_

"Barton, Trowa!" 

*the hat blurts out right away* "RAVENCLAW!" 

"Maxwell, Duo!" 

*the hat decides, thinks about it for thiry seconds then yells* "SLYTHERIN!" 

"Winner, Quatre!" 

*the hat yells almost immediately* "HUFFLEPUFF!" 

"Wufei, Chang!" 

*the hat decides for a bit then yells* "GRYFFINDOR!" 

"Yuy, Heero!" 

Heero: _*to hat* If I'm not in the same house as Duo you can play a nice game of 'seek and destroy' with my gun..._

*hat flinches, then yells right away* "errr.... **SLYTHERIN**!!!!!" 

***** 

And now, the spoofy ending! 

Heero: *walks into Quatre's room* Quatre, have you seen my stereo-   
Quatre: *is bouncing on the bed with the music blasting, and wearing a skirt* **_IT'S MY PARTY AND I'LL CRY IF I WANT TO, YOU WOULD CRY TOO IF IT HAPPENED TO YOUUUUUU!!!!!_**   
Heero: *ruhses downstairs and runs into a very seductive Duo* _(A/N: *chuckles*)_   
Duo: *puts his mouth right next to Heero's ear so he can feel his warm breath* now doesn't Quatre scare you sometimes?   
Heero: *flushes and nods* oh yeah...   
*Duo and Heero fall to the ground and make out passionately* 

*curtain closes as what goes on soars the show rating* 

Melissa: Eheheheh... soooo... hows *that* for an ending, eh? 

*everyone cheers, then moans in protest as they didn't get to see more* 

Comon now, I can't just make it a porn fic. 

*random person* YES YOU CAN! 

Hehehe... maybe later. I dunno. But, comon people, no reviews, no ending!!!! 

See ya for now, and you can always email me with suggestions at [tigerlilly527@hotmail.com][1]!   
  
  


   [1]: mailto:tigerlilly527@hotmail.com



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